PuRpLe PuMpKiNs...

FINALLY I get the chance to put together our pumpkin photos!

It is tradition. Every year, we go with Jeff's parents to the pumpkin farm and the kids get to pick out their arms loads of pumpkins. Madison was so excited to go. We asked her what kind of pumpkin she wanted and all she wanted was a PURPLE pumpkin. LOL! She had no idea, the silly girl, that pumpkins are not purple. She is so in love with the color purple. It is the strangest thing to see a little girl NOT love pink. LOL!

Anyway, there were short pumpkins, fat pumpkins, lumpy pumpkins, pumpkins that were HUGE and pumpkins with huge stems. Madison was caught running back and forth to the trunk of the van putting in little gourds and pumpkins. She was totally stocking up. LOL! She had fun.

It was BITTERLY cold that day. We all nearly froze before we picked out the pumpkins. It didn't take us too long. Matthew picked a really BIG pumpkin. Madison and Bethanie had nice carving sized pumpkins with thick stems. They each have smaller pumpkins too that we will save to decorate for Thanksgiving. Even yet, there were small teeny pumpkins we brought inside to decorate in a basket.

It was fun. We love Halloween and Madison really is starting to understand the whole "Trick Or Treat" thing by going up to the doors and knocking, opening her bag. She has been practicing. LOL!

SeMeStEr...

I don't know if I am going to make it through this semester. I am really considering not taking classes in the Spring semester. My plan is to do all on line courses, where I can enroll in one at a time, finish it, then enroll in another. I have 4 that I have to do. That would be about one class a month. I guess in some ways it might be easier if I can keep myself disciplined enough to do the work. I am almost ready to complete my one online course that I have left. I have my Ab Psych mid term at 8 in the morning. I am going to try to do the make up test right after that in my free hour. I really just want to quit, to be honest. I keep telling myself that I KNOW I CAN DO THIS. I KNOW I CAN. I CAN DO IT. *SIGH*

My poor husband is sick. I don't know what is wrong with him. It almost seems like his gall bladder or something. Tomorrow he is calling in sick and going to the Dr if I have to drag him there myself.

With all this stuff going on with Matthew and the school (mediation, possible due process, dragging the staff through every single day), and the stuff with Church, my anxiety is through the roof. I had the worst panic attack on Sunday. It was the worst that I have had by far. I have to find a way to manage my stress. It is truly getting the better of me. I hate this punched in the gut kind of feeling constantly. I hate feeling like I cant get everything (anything) done, and done right. I hate the feeling like I am not going to do well with my classes. I am in such a negative state right now and I really need that support. Thank Heaven for my family. Jeff's parents and my parents have been so good to help, even to just listen to us vent (which we do a lot these days).

Our names were in the paper tonight about the School Board Meeting. A concerned parent called us tonight with kids in High School and apparently she is going through the same thing with the same people. It sounds like she might be a single parent, I am not sure. I CANT IMAGINE DOING THIS ALONE! I hope we can help her. This is so hard...

My SwEeT BeThAniE...

Oh my GOSH! My heart is so full of love for this person! Let me tell you about her!

Bethanie was our surprise baby! She came to us after 10 long years of wondering if we would ever get pregnant! What a shock, that day, when I found out! Seemed like she just wanted to take her own sweet time coming to our family-NOT! She ended up coming almost 2 months earlier than we had planned! It was very scary, but she came and was very healthy, and beautiful!

Bethanie has grown to be a very compassionate and giving young lady. She is very shy in her demeanor and as strange as it sounds, she LOVES to perform. Bethanie is in 2nd grade now, but when she was in preschool, she started to do dance classes, which she has continued ever since then. Her shyness never keeps her from performing. Next week she gets the chance to be a cheer leader, which she has always DREAMED of doing!

Bethanie has no enemies. She is a friend to everyone. Her goal is to make others happy. If she sees you dropped your ice cream on the ground, she will happily offer hers to you. That is just how she is! So self-less, so loving to everyone!

I want to be just like her when I grow up! I love this child with all my heart! I know she was given to us to remind us about peace and comfort in our often times "Stormy" life. :O) I am so proud of her and all that she is! I LOVE YOU , BETHANIE!!!

ReSoLuTiOnS...

So, now we are moving on to a new phase with the school. We are going to mediation. We went to a school board meeting tonight and said our peace and now we move on to getting more things settled that NEED to be settled with a member of the State Board of Education (mediator that is getting involved). I have to say, this has been a very painful and frustrating thing to go through as parents. Taking on the school system has been extremely stressful. It is literally a daily battle. Jeff and I are both dealing with a lot of stress and anxiety. I know I have been quite pointed lately but I think that if you can question why, then you aren't listening! LOL!

Anyway I look forward to having things resolved with the school so we can get on with life.

I'm Still Here!

Just been a bit busy. Can you believe that NEXT WEEK IS MIDTERM already? WAHOO!!! I ended up dropping Elem. Algebra. Seems as though I cant invest that kind of brain power to my day. However, I am happier that I dropped it, even though it means I wont graduate in May. :O(

When I get a chance over the next few days, I will post some pictures of our trip to the Pumpkin Patch!

OcToBeR aLrEaDy...

Where is the time going? Seems like I have been so busy, time is flying by. I cant believe it is October. The weather has been GORGEOUS and chilly! So early, too! My kids have been very busy playing with their friends. I love that! I hate the mess that follows but I love that we are the happening place for the neighborhood children. LOL!

My classes are going OK. I am dropping my elementary algebra class. I cant put my mind to math. I just cant get it. This means I probably wont be graduating in May. How disappointing. However; I am still a mother and I cant put myself through so much stress over math when I have so many other things going on.

Jeff and I have been fighting with the school system for our son. We are now involving the state board of education in the fight. IEP is not being followed and they are trying to bully us into sending our son to a VERY restricted teaching environment. It wont happen. Matthew is completely capable surviving and learning in the class room with his peers. The school is literally crippling him. Every day it is a battle. We had to make them give him a choice just to eat lunch with his peers. We found out that he was not being allowed to make the choice and he has been eating mostly alone in the gifted room. HOW SAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyway, my mood these days has stunk. I am overwhelmed in my mind with my responsibilities and emotions. I know this wont last forever. I need to get through school so I can work.

Jeff likes his new job. It isn't to say it has been without challenges. He is adjusting to it though and it is really nice to have him home for supper EVERY SINGLE NIGHT!!!